There is some time in a person’s life when they want to run away.
Things are too difficult or they are just too overwhelmed.
That’s how I am feeling today.
I might NOT feel this way tomorrow
But
I do right now.
My dearest friend from 30 years ago came to visit me.
{i cried like a baby for an hour after she left}
She lived in an apartment one floor below me in my building in NYC.
She was a gorgeous model and actress.
She was also my maid of honor when I married.
She has been living in Naples Fla. For 2 years. I found her on face book.
{well it is good for something} And she had been trying to find me through
the newspapers. She didn’t know my married name…..but I always kept my maiden name.
she didn’t know.
It was so warm and fuzzy to see her.
But it has been 30 YEARS.
She is so brilliant, brave and funny……..
I don’t know what it was but it stirred up all sorts of things in my head and heart.
She had more hilarious stories that had me on the floor
additionally they often seemed sad. And were. I love her. So they were sad to me.
I worried for her.
I am worried for me.
These are hard times for a woman alone.
She would love this room and read every book in it.
And here we could plane our adventures for the day
over cafe and cakes.
I just wish all would work out with my business,
I want to have a place for her.
I have a lousy time of it making new friends……
It is always the OLD PALS that I treasure & trust.
So this is where I want to run to !
I am by nature, melancholy.....
I need to figure all of this BIG STUFF out!!
Maybe it's in the air, or maybe the solar flares are getting to me, but I feel the same....I am sitting at my desk after a long day, and down the street they are taking down scores of 100 year old+ trees for a large addition to a 3500 square foot home for 2 people!!! In their 70's!!! I can feel the earth shake as these living things fall...and can almost hear their screams and the screams of the animals they gave shelter to. I mean, these trees were here before us and should be here long after us....what is wrong with these people?
ReplyDeleteo.k.....I feel better...sorry for the rant, but I still want to run away...especially to that fabulous house!
Have a beautiful evening R...........k
I'm so sorry you're feeling overwhelmed and sad. Sometimes, no matter how good we are or how hard we work, nothing seems to go our way. It's so difficult to keep smiling when our world is crumbling around us. I lost my job two months ago and, in spite of a concerted effort to find something, my phone isn't ringing off the hook with job offers. In addition to trying to find work, I'm also trying to cope with my senile mother who phones me several times a week to accuse me of stealing things that she's misplaced. Really nasty, horrid phone calls that batter my already bruised soul.
ReplyDeleteI could use a place to run away to. The one in the picture will do quite nicely.
HI Dear Renee
ReplyDeleteI know just how you feel.. I want to run away with you.. Lucky for me you found us the perfect place.. haha
There must be something in the air at present.. this morning i had a call from an old friend.. I've known for 20+ years and haven't seen recently... and the thing is with old friends. even if work colleagues.. you can speak freely and honestly without judgement. They know what you are made of.. they've seen the best and worst and value all... I can certainly understand your feelings
Hang in there and remember eventually new friends will be old friend also.. ciao xxx Julie
i must say....
ReplyDeleteyou guys would be perfect to run away with.
even my girlfriend S.D. would be happy about it.
maybe you are right....
the is something in the air.
SQUEAKY, i totally get you.
and KATHY....the old trees being taken down is tragic.
and....julie,
i have been waiting to runaway on a trip with you for some time.
it seems to me you always go to the best places!!!
xxx
Renee, you have taken on a lot this year, emotionally, physically, financially. Keep all of this in mind.
ReplyDeleteYou have many, many friends whether you realize it or not. It is great when we can pick right up with lifelong friends. At our age though we are experiencing new chapters in our lives...as hard as it is; try to embrace it and be open, open your heart...I am here.
xoxo
Karena
Art by Karena
I have...ran away. The hardest is coming back, in tears, fear, immense sadness. I no longer wish to run away as i find less overwhelming to deal with each day as it comes. Business is so incredibly demanding, difficult, some days i am in total despair. I would normally "run it off "by going in the woods and trek, run, climb. Unfortunately, after an injury i have been wearing a leg cast for 3 months, so I read, breathe and work, work non stop, making notes, thinking new ideas.Last fall in High Point, during a very crowded event, I heard Francine!!! i turned around to immediately see my college friend whom I had not heard from in 30+ years. I had visited her many times in South America and we lost track of each other, we talked the night away. This was such a flash of my much younger life, I loved seeing my friend
ReplyDeleteHang in there, the saying, take one day at the time, give it all you have, works. Try it, and if you srill want to run away, Axel Vervoordt castle is a little far, why don't you just get on jetBlue and come to New York and meet some new friends.
karena
ReplyDeleteyou always say the right thing.
and
i have taken on a great deal and all by myself.
i do not have support from the home front
{or shall we say the nursing home}
so it definitely can jack 'the fear factor' up.
i am so grateful you are here in my life.
xx
When you go to that place can I go with you?????????I know you will persevere.......So glad you met your old friend!!!!!!!!!!I got a little woosy reading this......Maryanne xo
ReplyDeleteI love what Francine said. I think she's right. I so know what you're feeling right now. I agree, a woman alone is not how it's supposed to be, is it? Your mom told me she's going in for hip replacement surgery. Renee, you MUST be there with her, I think she's afraid. You know I love both of you guys. This post was brilliant BTW. xx's
ReplyDeletemaryanne - bead board
ReplyDeleteit brought up all kinds of stuff that i was not prepared for.
thank you for you empathy.
love you xxx