Saturday, April 21, 2012

Death Of A Dream


It has been 24 hours now since I closed the store.
In all my months there I did get but only one walk in customer.
Towards the end I went all but crazy. Maybe I did go crazy.
This failure I take very personally, 



All though there were stores closing all around me…..
Florida is in a desperate state for sure.
The design industry is all but shot.
Except for a few that are holding hands with the most successful
real estate brokers selling 3 million {and upwards} dollar condos.
That’s how it goes here.
-Tons of money or none.



And NO,
I couldn’t get anyone to hold my hand that was selling anything,
Much less something worth spending money on with a designer to put window treatments in to,
Or anything else that was pricy or fabulous.
What’s the deal…..do my armpits smell????

I tried to keep a stiff upper lip, but the facts are the facts.
I just had to get out.
I am pretty devastated by this and may not be posting for a while.
Maybe I will finally be able to visit your blogs ,
If I can get my chin off the ground and stop this shitty piss poor feeling inside.
I will get through this.
I know…
I always f---ing do.



And yes, I am angry at myself, the economy, and life in general.
I am mostly angry because I am so overwhelmed and sad.
When I get off my pity pot and figure things out…
I will be back.
To those of you that I love…
I send you more of it.
xx




Renee Finberg 'TELLS ALL' in her Blog of her Adventures in Design,Previous Owner of 'The Trade' Interiors, ,Boca Raton,Palm Beach,Boca Raton Florida,All custom upholstery,case-goods,window treatments,Antiques, Accessories and Antique accessories, built-ins, and all built in seating, bedding and pillows,Roseta Santiago Works Of Art, death of a dream, death of a dream, death of a dream

38 comments:

  1. Renée, I think it takes a huge amount of guts to open a store. So I think you are a star for doing so. I'm sorry about the dream... that is just so tough. But, in time you will slowly rekindle that original enthusiasm and passion for something new and something that is possibly a dream you've yet to discover. XX

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  2. My sweet Friend.

    YOU are NOT a failure....'stuff' happens. I know you gave it all that is in you and as you said the economic situation is no help. I KNOW there is a bright spot on 'the other side' of this. One day at a time sweet girl, one day at a time. You WILL get through, you are tough as nails and a fighter. The offer still stands to come let me love on you for a bit...Casa de Moore is open!

    xo

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  3. Sad to hear this, but its tough out there, people just dont have the money these days and the ones that do dont want to spend it or are too cheap!..Better things will come your way I know it.Hang in there and take all the time you need, I will be right here when you are ready..Big hugs my friend..xo

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  4. Renee-
    You are going to do just fine. It is these times that make us stronger and help us grow better.
    The economy is in a mess everywhere, and it is only going to get worse for a while. I spent 26 years in the banking and stock brokerage business and although I was out of the business before it took place, I could read the market and see where it was headed. Emotion is a strong indicator of what is going to happen. It is going to get worse before it gets better. People are not willing or can't spend a lot of money now. They're either wealthy or debt ridden.
    You can't blame yourself for this. The important thing is the lessons you learned that will make you much better in the future. You join a large percentage of business owners in this country and abroad.
    Pray, and let God guide your future. Take some time to contemplate what happened, and them move on. This is a part of a plan that we don't control. We just need to try and see where we are guided.
    You will be in my prayers, friend.
    Teresa
    xoxo

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  5. I know I've been a piss pore friend for not keeping in touch since I've moved. You impress me more than you know. We all talk about doing 'things', following our dreams, and yet 99.5% of us never allow ourselves to put one foot ahead of the other to make it happen. You did it, and yes, although it didn't turn out anything like your dreams took you, it's not for lack of drive, ambition or sheer talent; the result is due to the economy down the tanks. Just know that you are admired by so many. We all know your talents and your strong will, and you will pull through this. But I have to admit, this just really sucks. I care about you Renee Finberg, and staying on that pity potty you so rightly deserve, but don't forget that we want you back, making us laugh and giving inspiration like nobody can.

    Pop me an email anytime, I'm a good listener.
    Much love,
    Deb

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  6. *** I feel sooooo badly for you Renee... I mean, just AWFUL!!! I'm sure you know that everyone ELSE does, too!!!

    A genius I am NOT, but if I might suggest, I think you need to, FIRST of all, GO AHEAD with a "pity party"... you know, get the leftover kinks out, cry, rant, rave, cry some more... even feel sorry for yourself "to the max" (!)... you deserve it after working sooooo hard all this time!!!

    THENNNN, when you feel you can (don't wait TOO LONG, tho!), pick yourself up & say to yourself that pity time is OVER, and it's TIME to start something "new"... anything... hopefully something you will truly enjoy. I wish this for you~~~

    Keep the faith,
    Linda in AZ *
    bellesmom1234@comcast.net

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  7. Renee,

    It's time for horse therapy. You know all about that don't you. Find them, spend time with them, ride them and heal two hearts at once. Dreams are-a-part-of life not our whole life.

    You are a diamond with many facets and this is a small part of who you are. Purchase a spiral notebook, new pen, and write out everything everyday until you have nothing more to say about this experience except that it is what it is a new experience.

    With your many hats promote yourself to the level of Design Consultant because you have opening a store to add to your experiences as well.

    Looks like you have a whole lot of good to feel good about...nothing can take that away...ever.

    With Earth Day upon us get out there and hug a tree..yes you heard me...hug a tree just for the new experience of it. All is well!

    xoxo
    Bette

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  8. Renee! I am so shocked to hear any of this. I have to tell you, since I read one of your amazing articles on the color 'blue' I was so in awe of you, so impressed with your brilliance, your genius, your raw talent, I was desperate to contact you. As it turns out, I only live minutes from you in Wellington. Unfortunately, I am on an unpaid medical leave so too am caught up in this terrible financial crisis. I was waiting until things were more stable before I could solicit your help. I am saddened to hear not really that your store closed, because this does happen to so many businesses, but by the fact that you have been so demoralized by these unfortunate events. You deserve to be rewarded for your accomplishments. You have been, you are and you will continue to be. You may not realize it though. Believe me.

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  9. Hello Renee

    I just recently found your blog and felt instantly connected.

    You have talent and tenacity which can not be taken from you. Yes, the economy sucks but great people always rebound and succeed again.

    I will be holding you in prayer

    Helen xx

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  10. Hey Ms Finberg,
    Guess what, your head is still there.... No lop off...Hey no blame game here on yourself.... What you didn't have was CAPITAL. It had nothing to do with your taste, your design talent or anything else, you may be thinking you did. And your pride has been hurt. I know how that feels when you are in a town and they are all watching to see how you do. And this is what will happen.... You will pick yourself up and become a little old ant that can move a rubber tree plant..... So start thinking ant like........ xo Maryanne You aren't finished yo are just getting started.....Silly Girl.

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  11. Oh my dear friend I am gutted, not because the store didn't work out, but because of the way it has left you feeling. I have so much admiration for you, not just because of your sharp wit and brilliant observations, but also because you had the raw courage to open the shop in the first place. That takes a fighter spirit! It's something that a lot of people would like to do, but are too scared of failing. You took the bull by the horns and faced it regardless. And the economy made it impossible. And so what? Ok, financially not good, to put it mildly. But, apart from financially, you will have gained more than you lost: experience, knowledge & belief in yourself that you are one hell of a gutsy lady.

    So a big hug to you from me, and lots of support because at the moment I know you feel down, and almost need to wallow in misery for a bit to grieve the loss. But that will pass, because you are such a strong spirit Renee. And you will then be stronger than ever. VB xx

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  12. This is just heartbreaking to read. If I lived in Florida I would have been using your services for sure. The state of things is indeed dire so you must not take it at all personally. It takes such immense courage and strength to do what you did. You will never have to feel you sat on the sidelines and wondered. And that is really something. Sending you lots of supportive vibes.

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  13. Oh Renee
    I'm so sorry to hear your news.. I've been such a slacker with everything lately and have not been keeping up..

    YOu know you went out there and tried!! You gave it a shot.. which is more than most do.. You know you can do it now.. think of it as a trial run.. you just need an economy that will support it.. so.. hang in there.. lurk in the mucky muck for a bit ..nothing wrong with that..it's healthy i think to 'deal' in any way that suits you best.. We'll all be here for you when you are ready...

    By the way.. this post is absolutely beautiful.. a testament to your ability to show emotion visually!!

    love to you.. ciao xxx Julie

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  14. Dear beautiful Renee, I don't know you except through this blog, but I can tell, you are smart and feisty and funny.....attributes which will come to serve you well again. I had my own home decor store for nine years, which I had to close for several reasons and I know how you feel, but there is life after death....allow yourself all the time it takes and you will re invent yourself again, we retailers always do! Many never realize a dream and you did....and I truly believe that when one door closes another will open, N.XOXO

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  15. Geez mate what a bummer.....but Virginia said it all so perfectly, you had the guts & courage to give it a go, where so many others wouldn't. I'm so lucky that I'm in a recession-proof business, something I'm grateful for every day. You need to take yourself off for an Annual General Meeting, brain-storm all the new opportunities in front of you, chose one & go for it.

    When I was so unhappy at work earlier in the year I networked like crazy, let everyone know I was looking for something new & just when I'd all but given up, this new job appeared. We love & believe in you Miss F. & don't you ever forget it girl.
    Millie xx

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  16. I'm so sorry to hear this. Another dream snuffed out by the economy. Recently at the ASID national president's meeting here in Houston I talked to the New York and the LA presidents about how business is going in their areas. They said it's just like everywhere.....the celebrity designers have all the moneyed clients and more work than they can handle and everyone else is just scraping by. The design business is changing and somehow we've got to adapt....again.

    I've been reading your blog and have admired your wit and smarts. You'll be back.

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  17. Hang in...silver linings and all that jazz....be proud you tried in such a ghastly economy...horse therapy sounds
    good...keep blogging we are all there with you! loads of hugs Heather

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  18. I am so sorry for you,so sorry your shop had to close,so sorry for the depression you´re in now.You´ve been so though to follow your dream...I am thinking about doing the same,I live in a small place but I have (too much) faith!!!!!!!!!!
    What happened tp you might happen to me...bu we have to follow our heart and try,that´s what I´m thinking!!
    One door has closed for you...another one will open!!!!!Maybe even more exciting things will happen for you???Wishing you all the best!!!
    Tovehugs:)

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  19. Shit! You go ahead and feel whatever you feel, when you are ready and you will be then decide where and what you want to do. You did not fail Renee, Nope; our damn governmnt has failed all of us. Just think if you were Bank of America you would have gotten a shit load of the taxpayers money, so you could stay in business and keep scewing the public.
    If I sound pissed I am. I am pissed that this has happened to so many people.
    I know that you are smart enough not to let this ruin the rest of your life. Way too smart. Take the time you need but we all will be waiting to hear from you, so don't take too long my friend.

    Love to you.

    Carol

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  20. Oh my darling girl I am here whenever you want. phone, skype(?!!), write or visit my ear is available, my shoulder soft and my hugs hard they are all here for you as you were there for me. All my love and thoughts Jules xxxxxx

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  21. Dearest Renee;
    Over the months, years, I feel as if i really got to know you, from your horrible boss to this venture of yours. You and i have one thing in common: we are so good at beating ourselves. I just attended the most amazing lecture during the Design Leadership Summit which I will try to share on a post (if i can get my acts together)
    Yes, the economy stinks, but still some people are doing quite well indeed, yes it is an exciting venture to start your own business, but we all need a little luck, which i never had, i always have to fight and sometimes i feel like giving in, being so exhausted at the end of the day from the stress of lack of business.Dear Renee, if you tried everything you could, invested your money, time, emotions, I beg you: do not look at this venture as a failure but as an experience and all experiences good or bad have a value. Nurture yourself for a while, how about a trip to Maine and really look at yourself and what makes you happy, energized....Bringing clarity in your life may make you look at your future in a different way.
    francine

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  22. So sorry to hear about your dream. But at least you tried to make your dream happen, which is more that you can say for most people, me included. Opening a store is hard at the best of times.

    I am echoing every sentiment from the previous posters. You will rebound and be back, stronger than ever, because failure is a learning experience.

    You need time right now to get over this. The horse therapy sounds like a great plan to me, anything to do with animals is healing.

    Big hugs to you Renée and please keep unloading to us. That's what we're here for.

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  23. An old Arab saying helped me get through the rough patches: "Dogs bark and the caravan keeps moving".

    Hold your head high and move on to the better things waiting for you!

    Your fan,
    Linda

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  24. to everyone who commented.

    ....isn't it the truth
    hoe when you are in down times,
    you find out who your friends are??!!
    i will be emailing each of you back individually. xxx

    i just cried and cried
    when i read these comments.
    what would i ever do without you?
    i am certain...
    i would go crazy!!

    love and (much needed) hugs
    xxxx's

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  25. Oh Renee, I am so sorry. I have been through my fair share of crap thru this economy but I can only imagine how upset you are right now. I hope you will be ok. I am sending lots of positive thoughts and good vibes your way.

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  26. Renee, I'm so sorry to hear this! Can't imagine how it must feel. But I think you really want to love yourself for trying!!! That IS a big deal. You tried! Then, you are such a great and sassy writer too. There is a bunch of really successful design blogs out there. You sure could be one of them!
    xoxo Maya

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  27. Renee...how I wish I lived closer, I would come right on over, even if i was uninvited and give you a giant bear hug, let you cry to your hearts content and bring you the biggest magnum of champagne I could find. First I am sad for you that this dream did not come to fruition as you had hoped, but one look around and you know it is not you, it is the economy, not an easy one to open up ANY business in. A good friend opened up a similiar business near us which caters to a very well to do neighborhood and lasted 6 months, she was devastated too. She sunk her heart and soul into it....however when one door closes another opens. I hope you know that, she just started working out of a small office doing design (no retail) and so far is off to a consistent and successful start. She is smiiling again and I know you will be too. Know you have a lot of support out here in blogland, its a rough economy but I do thinkt things are going to get better and retail is really tough in general. But I give you a boatload of credit for having the guts to go for it, try it, not just talk about it. Its a feather in your cap and I am sure you have learned somethings about business and yourself through this. I will close with a saying my grandfather always said "Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly" and I KNOW you will achieve once again!!!!!!!!! xoxo

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  28. OMG so sorry to hear about this. You are in my thoughts.Big dreams die hard...perhaps only to resurface at a different time, in a different way. Take care of yourself and know you are not alone. We care about you.

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  29. Renée, you did what the rest of us only talk about doing. You put your money where your mouth is and you went for it. we keep working for the man and complaining about it. I really look up to people who let themselves take risks, even if the results are not as hoped for. You deserve a ton of respect and should keep your chin up. Congratulations on going for it and turn the page to your next adventure xoxo
    Kim from twohouses.ca

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  30. I echo the other comments. A venture may not succeed but that's a business effort - that does not mean you're a failure. I remember following along when you worked at that place with the bully boss. I know this is a hard time but you'll come through. If you can, try to blog a bit because the support, connection and creative effort will be healing. Will be thinking of you. Michele

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  31. I'm so terribly sorry. I know what it is to close a business, to invest heart and soul and more, and see it seem to come to nothing, and it never feels better that nearly everyone else seems to be in the same boat. I always feel such an emotional connection to that movie, You've Got Mail with Meg Ryan, when she has to close her shop.

    I hope your skies are clearer and brighter soon!

    Thanks so much for stopping by my blog and for your sweet comment. I hope you'll be back often!

    Keri

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  32. Oh Renee, I'm so sorry reading this. I hope you WILL keep your chin up. It's no comfort at all to be told other people have the same problems, but I will say that I have more than one talented, visionary, deserves-to-win friend right now who has had their teeth kicked in by the economy. Many of them are continuing to dream, and to try, and I hope you will too.
    -SF

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  33. Just popping in again Renee to make sure you are ok and hanging in there. As you say, you find out who your friends are when times are tough. And reading these beautiful comments, you have plenty of friends! Big hugs to you. VB xx

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  34. Dearest Renee,

    I read your post on the weekend and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. Even whilst driving around town I keep thinking of what you're going through. I showed my husband Andrew your post and said look!!!! this girl is amazing and amazingly honest.

    I think the situation you're in is just bad horrible luck and I don't really have the right to comment on what you should do, except that life at the moment is dishing out hard stuff to so many. I know exactly what you're going through....I have been there! life does get better, but.... sometimes it takes a while, sometimes years!!

    I am personally getting really sick of people that show off through their blogs, (it's not a competition) I think you're fabulous Renee for being so honest and you may well have changed me a little bit this week....thanks xx This may not be what you're wanting to hear right now , I know there are many changes happening in our world spiritually , thanks for showing me a little more.
    Please don't stop blogging, write more...go girl, you have far too much to share.

    xx Coty

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  35. I am so sorry for your loss, it sucks...life is like that sometimes. I read your post and it reminded me of my life two years ago....I won't go into the details but it involved damage to house in. Hurricane, loss of job, sick pet, loss of friends because of job, and too many other thing to write here....let's just say that every month for six months it was something else. At times it seemed so bad I could not get out of bed and on good days it just seemed so bad I was sick of it and me.

    You are in one of the most depressed real estate markets in the country. My friend is a rep for Robert Allen in northern Florida and Ga, she has lost 75 % of her business...you are not lone my dear.

    You need to do what is right for you, if that is cry than cry,if that is scream than go to it but know this, all of your faithful readers are rooting for you! Whatever is the next step we will follow along on your journey. You are a strong, talented and beautiful woman and you and your blog bring happiness to many. We are here to support you!!

    Do not listen to the people asking what is next, it is too soon for that, the closing of your store is too new, you must grieve for that. When the time is right you will know what to do.

    In the meantime, I m praying for you and sending. Big hug your way.

    Elizabeth

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  36. Renee I am commenting late, however, you are a brave and confidant woman.

    Renee,
    Sometimes things are out of control, and then there is point of not throwing good money into a venture that isn't working out!

    It is not your fault! Hold your head up fine and don't let this break your spirit!

    xoxo
    Karena
    Art by Karena

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  37. Oh Renee,
    How did I miss all this happening to you. The one thing that shines through in all your posts is your strength. This is not the hill you will die on. Another door will open. Could you focus your efforts into an online business somehow instead of bricks and mortar? Don't quite know how your industry works. Keep your chin up and it's just another of life's lessons. Trust me, you will learn and grow from it.
    Big hugs coming your way.
    Di
    Xoxoxo

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  38. Renée, so sorry to read about the closure of your store. The world's in a bad state at present but I know there will be sweeter dreams for you. Be happy, you're much loved and admired!

    ♥♥ and (((hugs))) from Oz,
    Alaine x

    P.S. Keep blogging; I'm another who really enjoys reading your Adventures in Design and I love your spirit!

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THE COMMENTS ARE WHAT MAKES A GREAT POST!!!

Thanks for participating!!

About Renée Finberg

I have been in this business since the age of 22.

I love what I do and cannot imagine my life without Design.

Design Challenges are great.

And because of those challenges

I have imported fine antique pieces from Paris,

Designed and Manufactured Furniture,

Created Fantastic Window Treatments,

And solved all kinds of spatial & architectural issues

With my unique style.

If I can't find it, I create it.

My rooms would make excellent movie sets.

I am a visual, tactile and audio sensitive individual.

Creating is what I live for, not math, not spelling, not science.

Just Great Design.

Just imagine how it would be if each of us,

If only for a few hours of everyday,We could be in a space that is our very own.A place that is exactly the way we want it to be

Surrounded by all the things we wanted to see,

The atmosphere we wanted feel, smell and the sound we wanted to listen to.

Private Paradise

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Renee Finberg 'TELLS ALL' in her Adventures in Design by Renee Finberg is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
Based on a work at www.reneefinberg.com.
Permissions beyond the scope of this license may be available at reneefinberg@gmail.ocm.

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