Monday, June 14, 2010

I Am Under-Whelmed

I am feeling underwhelmed, um .....well....
I really mean overwhelmed.
There is very little business going on.
People are just not
beating showroom doors down to buy furniture.
Well, at least not here in Boca Raton, Florida.

And what decent work I have in front of me....
I just can't seem to 'get centered' and get it going.
You know... the tedious stuff,

the drawings, the estimates from workrooms, the phone calls, and the follow ups....etc, etc.
Boring and tedious this designing life can be.

I have also lost a close male friend of mine this past week.
It was unexpected....but not a surprise if you get my meaning.
He had struggles, and they were not money struggles,
relationship struggles, or health struggles.

He was 52 and I think he may have died of a broken heart.

He was misunderstood in more ways than I could begin to explain.
He loved poetry.
He would read it to me for hours, or until I begged him to stop...
or I just fell to sleep....but he would keep reading.
He loved it so.
And if you ever met him
you would never believe this guy was into poetry.
He put up very tall walls to keep people away
He always lowered the bridge for me.
Like I said, he was my friend.
I will miss him.
Who knows, someday he may be reading poetry to me again. 

I am underwhelmed and overwhelmed 
at the same time.
I have a bad habit of not dealing with 'events'
if you know what I mean.
I am so busy trying to keep up with all I have 'to do' 
that I just stuff my feelings into some 'feelings closet'
so that I can just keep up with the 'beat of my drum.'
I am feeling irritable and discontent.
Not good.
I think I will make some brownies.
XXX's 


Renee Finberg 'TELLS ALL' in her BLOG..... Interior Design, Palm Beach, Boca Raton,Ft.Lauderdale,Design Service, Window Treatments, TurnKey Interior Design Service,Paint selection, Floor-Plans,Online Interior Design, Design Center of The Americas, D.C.O.T.A., irritable and discontent,the drawings, the estimates from workrooms, the phone calls, and the follow ups
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22 comments:

  1. Restless too? I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. Not surprising you lost your center.

    It will return. Chocolate does help. So does a big hug, I'm sending you one. Fell a little better?

    Give time time. xoxo Jane

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  2. jane

    the hug did help.
    love you xx

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  3. may you find your balance soon.

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  4. Ooh brownies do sound good and they are soothing. You know I'm a deal with it all to the point of exhaustion kind of girl. That tends to make me forget entirely about the "to do" list. I'm not sure if either of our ways are healthy ones but I guess being aware of it is half the battle right? I do hope you have the chance to beg him to stop reading poetry to you once again. Hang in there! ;)

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  5. Oh, Renee! I am so sorry to her of the loss of your friend. It's so very unfortunate. My modus operandi in these situations is always, "what am I supposed to learn from this"? I'm so glad that he got to experience your tender, kind heart. I know you made a difference in his life.

    Hugs, hot coffee and gooey brownies to you! I wish I were there to share the entire pan with you.

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  6. Renee, I have sent you a return email about mindfulness and then saw it was a noreply so you may not get it. Check out Jon Kabat-Zinn and his book Full Catastrophe Living. I hope this helps and if you did get the email it goes into more detail.
    Thinking of you and also sending big, big hugs. xx

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  7. Losing a dear friend makes one feel so many things but also dead inside, where so much becomes meaningless. I am so sorry. I know you will come out of this and be as brilliant and creative as ever.

    Karena
    Art by Karena

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  8. Love your honesty Renee! Sorry to hear about your friend...it's very difficult to care about work stuff when personal stuff is so overwhelming! Hope you get your inspiration back soon! Tracey xx

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  9. HI Renee
    Sorry to hear about the loss of your friend.. very sad... I hope he has found some peace now.... and I hope you can open the 'feeling cupboard' and let some fresh air in....

    Sorry I haven't been over lately... been away from blogging for a bit trying to deal with 'stuff' hahaha... hope this week brings you some joy!! xxx Julie

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  10. Renee,

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Please take comfort here and may peace seek you.


    Do not stand at my grave and weep,
    I am not there, I do not sleep.
    I am in a thousand winds that blow,
    I am the softly falling snow.
    I am the gentle showers of rain,
    I am the fields of ripening grain.
    I am in the morning hush,
    I am in the graceful rush
    Of beautiful birds in circling flight,
    I am the starshine of the night.
    I am in the flowers that bloom,
    I am in a quiet room.
    I am in the birds that sing,
    I am in each lovely thing.
    Do not stand at my grave and cry,
    I am not there. I do not die.

    ~Mary Elizabeth Frye~

    Bette

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  11. granny...
    sharing my brownies with you is something that i would love to do.
    ...someday
    xx

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  12. Would a couple of weeks Down Under help sweetie? It's Winter & freezing cold, but the fire is warm & cosy. MOTH's on the final stretch of the Bathroom-From-Hell & needs a Cheer Squad to edge him over the line. Maybe it's time to use your Get Out Of Jail card, you'd be very welcome.
    Millie ^_^

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  13. millie
    you brought sweet tears to my eyes.
    oh....i would love to.

    like i said, maybe someday.
    i would love love love to spend time with you!!!

    love you xxx

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  14. A hot gooey brownie is poetry. Celebrate your friend's love for you.

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  15. Oh Renee,
    I'm so sorry to hear that you have lost a good friend. No wonder you are feeling the way you are. Something so sad like that can really bring you down.
    What is good is that you can vent all of your feelings to us faceless 'lot', which is brilliant as we have no other agenda other than wanting to help and make you feel better.
    I guess that these events are just part of everyone's everyday lives and they can bring us down.
    Go and make batches and batches of delicious brownies Renee, and eat the lot.
    Look after yourself and try to keep 'up'. Will be thinking of you. XXXX

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  16. I think it is a sign of the times. Try to keep your chin up dear. It is hard to remember, in times like these. Be thankful for you, yours and all that you are able to do. For such a time, the world was spinning so fast; it has now slowed down quite a bit. Enjoy that time and let your inner you relax. The rest will come in due time.
    L.

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  17. I think that is why I am a decorator...I do not deal well with reality, so I just change it.
    We are lucky that we get to be creative and let it out. K

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  18. thank you to my dear friends,
    i am listening.
    xx

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  19. So sorry about your friend....no wonder you're feeling blue. It sounds like you had a lovely relationship.
    I know what you mean about work, sometimes it's hard to get excited when it's the same old thing. Potato chips work for me more then chocolate!!!
    xxx
    Carole

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  20. Renee, I could have written this post. I am feeling the same as to work and last month a childhood friend of my brother and myself committed suicide-52, It is painful.I am sorry for your loss. pgt

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  21. Sorry to hear of your friend's death.

    I know what you mean about getting motivated... I'm supposed to be putting together a room storyboard and I just can't get the energy to do it... it is a job that is one of those far and few too and I should be thankful... I think you and I need a pep talk from your mother!

    Hang in there... you're not alone!

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  22. fifi
    uh oh...............
    trust me.
    that's no pep talk!!!
    it's more like
    "do or die"

    hahahaha

    xx

    ReplyDelete


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About Renée Finberg

I have been in this business since the age of 22.

I love what I do and cannot imagine my life without Design.

Design Challenges are great.

And because of those challenges

I have imported fine antique pieces from Paris,

Designed and Manufactured Furniture,

Created Fantastic Window Treatments,

And solved all kinds of spatial & architectural issues

With my unique style.

If I can't find it, I create it.

My rooms would make excellent movie sets.

I am a visual, tactile and audio sensitive individual.

Creating is what I live for, not math, not spelling, not science.

Just Great Design.

Just imagine how it would be if each of us,

If only for a few hours of everyday,We could be in a space that is our very own.A place that is exactly the way we want it to be

Surrounded by all the things we wanted to see,

The atmosphere we wanted feel, smell and the sound we wanted to listen to.

Private Paradise

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